Hammer & Halo -Part Two

I’m a product of Eastern guy meets Western gal… a lot Southern and almost as much Western roots define me. I am part dusty prairie lands, cowboy boots, amazing mountains, breathtaking vistas, snow in July, Morning Glory House and cottonwood trees.

My last blog post was an “ode” of sorts to my Mamaw, my Dad’s momma. Not thinking of being fair to my family tree but more in a spirit of balance….. because that’s what my grand-mothering experience has always felt like in my life.

I never took for granted the fact that I was completely blessed and probably somewhat of an anomaly to experience having 2 sets of grandparents for a good part of my life. And, to have a real relationship with them as well.

She was “Grandma” to me, my mother’s mom. Stern on the outside, but had a soft spot for all her grand-babies. I’m the oldest of those and bear the name (as my middle name), she gave to my momma… I always thought that was totally cool to be the lucky one “bestowed” with such an intimate but obvious family heirloom as a name that Grandma chose for her first born (my mom) and in turn my mom chose to give me. So, it’s a treasure to me to share that name among the three of us.

She is the hammer in this story…. and that’s not a bad thing; opposites attract right? My Grandpa was the halo in the relationship and I’m sure at times these roles were reversed between the two of them. Especially since he was a former cattle driving, rodeo busting kinda cowboy guy.

But, most of the stories I’ve heard over my lifetime, she was definitely the tough as nails gal, the hammer.

This industrious entrepreneurial spirited duo created a business after many years of toil and trouble, surviving the Depression, and so many other trials, I could write an entire book on those.

Their small clay mining enterprise has lived beyond them. Clay as in bricks and some of those bricks made it to the launch pad at Cape Canaveral, Florida.

I have so many memories of our summer visits with Grandma and Grandpa. He was in the background always ready for a hug or a warm smile but she ran the show!

The adventure of getting all the way out west to visit was just the start of those summers… 1500 miles or so… one way…before interstate highways AND air conditioned cars, and definitely WAY before DVD players in cars!!

But I am a better person for those trips, for those visits; for that time spent together.

However at the time, I was bummed because friends were going to the beach and we were driving an incessant amount of miles to visit Grandparents….. I know now the nature of my parents mission with those annual trips. Especially my mom, this was her family and she wanted them to know us and visa-versa.

Grandma was always checking in on me through the years… not happy that my first Christmas out of college and working, I had to spend Christmas alone….Growing up, she always made sure I had a separate birthday present besides the Christmas presents she would send us. That special package would sit under the tree until my day. But the fact she took the time to make such a point of recognizing my day still warms my heart!

I know Grandma came from tough. Earlier generations of her family migrated here from Europe with nothing. She would tell us stories of how only English was allowed as the spoken language amongst them and nothing from the culture left behind, not even the food was allowed into their lives. Total acceptance and assimilation into the American lifestyle and culture was the expectation…no ifs ands or buts - so yes she was tough.

She was the perfect hammer to make way for her accompanying halo, my Grandpa. But I would definitely rate her “halo worthy” as well. So to stick with the title of the story, I’d say she’s deserving of both and had the ability to interchange them!

As I close my post today, I’m sharing a couple of poems I’ve written about Grandma.

Just to preface this first poem, she and Grandpa visited Tennessee for the first time in the late 70’s. This was back when you could actually SEE people deplane onto the tarmac. (Just like Air Force One.. but with more people in front of you and behind you and no Secret Service escort!)

This piece is titled A Tribute to Grandma and I wrote it soon after she passed:

I remember you so regal there,

Standing at that top stair

Out of the plane you walked,

Mink collar coat and black patent pumps.

You walked off the plane so straight and tall, as always in control.

Behind you he came the gentleman,

In cowboy hat and Sunday boots.

It was so exciting, I remember it well, your first trip to Tennessee!

What a pair the two of you -

The things you’ve seen and done, the things you’ve overcome-

The cowboy and his girl.

You seemed so hard at times but softness grew eventually,

Your days were numbered at the end,

Just mere skin and bones -

Your eyes so big and blue, seemed to soak us all up in your gaze.

We didn’t want to say goodbye and leave you lying there -

There is a time for everything and it was time to go.

We are so glad that in your heart you placed our Savior dear,

Your passing is not quite so hard,

Knowing where you now reside!

A new body He has given and your pain He has erased.

Aren’t you glad our precious Lord was waiting for you there!

In our hearts you will stay Grandma, our special cowboy’s girl!

Here’s my second piece I wrote after her estate was settled, things were divided among her children and all that earthly stuff that has to happen, happened…I never gave it a title it was just my heart on paper - and seems to sum up everything I was trying to squeeze into this post today without turning into a mini novel - so here goes:

She never got to say goodbye

She was never there again

The little green house at the end of the lane-

It will never be the same,

all her stuff’s been divided

the hub bub has subsided

Roses will never grow again in the garden so dear

Her precious rocks remain, barbed wire, bottles … what a collection!

As the dust quickly settles and my memories rise,

I’m thankful I knew you Grandma - way out there,

Treasure will I always, the trips that I made 

to the little green house at the end of the lane.

I appreciate your being here today -

Blessings,

Rhonda