Father’s Day

So today is our first without you. You never liked us making a big deal of any of the “Hallmark Holidays” as you liked to call these commemorative days on the calendar.

I’m not too sad, just finding myself introspectively reflecting as I do much of the time lately….

I was given a gift card from friends after your passing, to a local nursery to buy a plant or tree to place in our yard in your memory… but I realize that after 20 years here, I am actually cutting down many of the over planted trees and foliage I have placed in the yard over the years. So putting one more vegetation species out just wasn’t going to be something I cared to do.

As I visited the nursery recently with the gift card in hand, it dawned on me how much you loved our birds. I mean they sing all the time here. We are surrounded by beautiful melodies as long as the sun is up! You loved to sit out back on the patio and listen to them. I believe they brought your heavy heart and over thinking brain much peace. I think of you every time I stop to take a listen.

I walked out of the nursery with my first ever bird feeder and all the things to do it right. I think you would like it, you would just probably fuss about where I’ve placed it, which is outside of my newly located office in the front of the house. And the timing of putting it out today seemed perfectly commemorative and that, I hope you don’t mind!

As I start work tomorrow, I can’t wait to see who comes to visit! I’m looking for the cardinal that lets me know you’re in Heaven thinking about us, or something like that as legend has it…. I even splurged for the infamous hummingbird feeder as well. I know you loved those too… so we’ll see. It will be a lovely way to work all day, and a beautiful addition to my front window view.

So, even though you aren’t here, your spirit lives on strongly and I try my best to honor that in whatever way I can. You were bigger than life to me and I always knew you were meant for another world… so few of us really got your complex self.

And by the way, you did a good job by our boy, he is truly a gift and I’m glad a little bit of you is still here with me - I know your earthly example of a father was hugely lacking and for that I have always been so very heart broken for you… but I want you to know you did okay despite that. And nice touch with the rainbow Heaven spread over his hospital as he drove to work today! Such a comforting reminder that God’s got all three of us in His palm no matter what realm we currently exist.

Here’s to your memory I hope you enjoy me feeding your birds and Happy Heavenly Father’s day -

Love, Rhonda