Remnant

It’s everywhere, the shaggy hemmed remnant of what my life was just 10 months ago - the remnant of a life that in a snap of a finger moment, catapulted into a different chapter.

This word REMNANT has always intrigued me - it’s connotation swinging back & forth between negative & positive. It explains perfectly where I am right now. I like that it can be construed as “either or” - good or bad; that is life now - sometimes good, sometimes not.

The remnant of my hubby, the remnant of a house filled with busy-ness, lots of cooking, constant entertaining, comings & goings etc. This is the adjustment, finding my legs again. I was so tethered to “my other half” that I may have lost some of me in the 32-plus years of the balancing act that marriage takes.

Figuring out the puzzle pieces, these remnants I’m left with of my life is emotionally draining on a good day. I’m not referring to just physical belongings, but all the THIS. What parts & pieces & people are included going forward, how do I guard my heart - who do I let in & how close do I allow them? Putting all that together to paint the landscape of what God is designing of my re-defined future is an overwhelming process. How long is the continuum of this reality? i just don’t know. It’s up to Him, not me.

There is no new normal, just a new version of the old. I’m a lover of checklists. This is how I organize every compartment of my life, how my brain works and this phase is not checklist friendly to say the least!

So here I sit, wondering what is around that next corner, grappling to hang onto some pieces of normalcy in my remnant. Praise God the constant is Him - Him here with me always. When a neighbor shows up on my driveway to lend a hand with a flat tire at 6:30am; a neighbor who has yet to allow me to drag my trash bins back up my steep drive; friends calling to check in right when I’m taking a dive into the darkness of self pity; a friend taking my car in for servicing; fur-baby sitting; invites to celebratory days when I would be alone otherwise…. and this is just the short list off the top of my head! I know He is with me, He’s sending messengers as needed, exactly when needed. Thank you Jesus that in heartache you swoop in and do it BIG!

I must carry on until my remnant has more pieces and I can put a new quilt of my life together, moving forward always.

Friends, I can leave you with this - never be discouraged no matter what you’re facing today! If Satan is throwing arrows of desperation your way, duck & seek cover. It is time to head to the throne!! You have an almighty King that rules the Universe and is waiting for your ask! Try some “knee time” at that throne! And I mean on your knees praying - present it all to Him - you will not be disappointed!

God’s endearing promise stated in Scripture, “The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding , will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:5-7).

Thank you for being here - gotta run, have a bird feeder to fill!